Score or Flop in the dating world of the digital age. Here is some advice from a matchmaker to make your day. You won’t believe your eyes, as some of this may surprise you. Turns out internet dating is not for the faint of heart.
If you’re single and searching {or just polyamorous}, an internet dating profile is almost as common to have as a Facebook, but meeting the person of your dreams is well… they don’t call it OK for nothing. As a Soulmate Matchmaker, of course I’m interested in searching for my own soulmates- soulmate friends, soulmate clients, soulmate network connections, and perhaps soulmate lovers too. Tools of the trade intrigue me, but after having an internet dating profile active for only a total of 1.25 months, I have already deduced some great tips of etiquette. We’ll start off with the
DON’Ts:
1. Say something to a stranger in a message that you wouldn’t say to them if you had just met them on the street or at a party! This is definitely number 1.
2. Make your first message sing to the tune of, “Hey, how is it going? How are you doing? What’s your name? How is your day?” Although it may seem like an average thing to say to a stranger, these types of messages are all too common and usually don’t get people’s attention.
3. Assume that you are going to definitely be dating or hooking up with someone you do not know in person. Then, dictating your language and behavior based on this illusionary assumption. Don’t take things too personally or seriously. I mean really, it is the internet people! If you take it too far in your head or in your heart, you’ll most likely end up trashing either your own emotions or someone else’s.
4. Say something to a stranger that clearly shows you did not read their profile information.
5. Be discourteous or call people names and use nasty or negatively inappropriate language. Name calling is for five year olds and doesn’t accomplish anything.
Now for the~
DOs
1. Be polite and respectful. If you are wishing to court someone, be courteous.
Have polite conversation, as if you were talking to a stranger you’ve never met {eh hem, because you are, usually}. It might sound like common sense, but get people on an “internet dating” site and they start saying all kinds of things they most likely never would, had you just met them in person.
2. Be witty, cleaver, humorous, and creative.
This usually defines you as unique, interesting, and attractive to converse with and it gets people’s attention and peaks their curiosity.
3. Have nice, attractive, creative photos that show you as you normally are.
Seriously, I don’t know why guys think that chest shots are a game winner. If a lady posted those they might be marked as sexually explicit. Profile pictures that look scary, with a strange expression, or with sunglasses on are also not good marketing material for your first impression. If you post a picture of your children or your pet, you better be in the photo with them.
4. Be Honest!
Be yourself and be honest. Be honest on your profile information. Be honest to other people and to yourself. Attempting to modulate your behavior or “appearance” just to try and win someone over that you have never actually met is not great juju to start out with, and it is energetically consuming to keep up an illusion.
5. Expect to meet like minded interesting people you wouldn’t otherwise have found out about. Just because you have to wade through trash to get to treasures, doesn’t mean you have to get discouraged. Be thankful for the real, genuine, nice connections you do make with people because for some, they may be few and far between.
Bonus: Google people you meet online, just saying, it’s fair.
If you’re wondering how I came up with some of this information, here is a nice sneak peak into the world of an OK profile to go along with my OK online dating experience. Granted, I have had people say nice things and make decent conversation, but here are some Oh No You Didn’ts for your online dating window:
I’m sure these are not the best first impressions these men have made.
First Message:
A message after I did not reply to this person’s first message:
Well, now you know why I declined communication with this person:
The world of internet dating is bigger than you are. Get out there and have a nice time, but more importantly, help others have a nice time too. And please remember DON’T Number 1! You may be on an internet dating site, but it’s still the internet:
“Don’t say anything to a stranger that you wouldn’t usually say if you had just met them on the street or at a party.”
Hi! I just want to offer you a big thumbs up for the excellent information you have about internet dating. I too have been really fed up with people’s weird behavior on the internet and it’s nice to know that some one out there gets my drift. Thanks for the helpful info!
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write a little comment to support you.
This actually answered my drawback, thanks!
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I have book-marked it for later!
Hello, this is a pleasant article on the topic of internet dating. We all need to be aware of the crazies out there and their silly behavior. Thanks for an enlightening post!
I find internet dating to be really something which I think I will never understand, but you actually make it seem so easy with your presentation.
Very practical and informative, you are good people. I’m looking forward to your next article, I’m trying to meet my soulmate!
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I have a date that I am really excited about, and I have been at the glance out for internet dating tips.
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it for him… lol. So let me reword this…. Thanks for the meal!!
But yeah, thanks for spending time to talk about this here on your website.
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And if your background reveals unhealthy issues about you, telling the reality
is still your best choice in these circumstances.